Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
