This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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