Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
