Non-Jews are for practice
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
