Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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