god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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