You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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