The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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