She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize