Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She's the barista slut.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
