Duck Duck Cougar?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
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