We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
