that's an acceptable place to lick
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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