Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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