But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Randomize
