I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
