it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize