I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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