i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
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