hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
