Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
