small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize
