I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize