don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
