Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
