you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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