Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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