Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
