It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
