the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Farmville is her only friend.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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