I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
