Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
