it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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