I think I died a long time ago.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
