I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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