i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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