yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Randomize
