Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
