I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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