Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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