I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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