Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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