you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
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