i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
