dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
