did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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