Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize