Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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