I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
