it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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