Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
